i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
