lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
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Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
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He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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