Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
