Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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