You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
