The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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