I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary