bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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