3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
