Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
