OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
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