im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize