Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
