I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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