Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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