the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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