help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
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