my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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