We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
