You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize