My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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