This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
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just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
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You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.