when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
