Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
