Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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