They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
