just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
