So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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