cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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