The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just high enough for therapy.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
