The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I am mentally ready for anal.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
