i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
