Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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