:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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