called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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