Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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