There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
