so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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