A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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