I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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