So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This is my gift to your gina
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize