Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize