im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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