his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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