stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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