I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
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