I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize