we're blogging at a bar
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
