All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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