Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize